Signs That You May Be A Redneck Jedi

  1. You ever heard the phrase, "May the Force be with y'all."

  2. Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

  3. You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Bud Light.

  4. At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

  5. You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

  6. You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

  7. The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is them dadgum skeeters.

  8. Wookies are offended by your B.O.

  9. You have ever used the Force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have to wait for a commercial.

  10. You have ever used the Force in conjunction with fishing or bowling.

  11. Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over to the Dark side... it'll be a hoot."

  12. You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.

  13. You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

  14. You ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

  15. You have the doors of your X-wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

  16. Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

  17. You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

  18. You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with redwood deck.

  19. You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

  20. The fact that Princess Leia is your sister makes your sex even better.

  21. Sex with a Wookie is kinda like the goats back home on Tatooine.

  22. Your Jedi Master tells you "Hmmmmn ... again will rise the South, yes!"

  23. You refer to Master Mace Windu as "Boy."

  24. Your have a concusion rifle rack in your speeder.

  25. You refer to your lightsaber as "Your Best Good Friend."

  26. You hear "Luke, I am your father... and your uncle."

Click here to view site policies.

Last Updated 19-Aug-2016   Sitemap

Pledge your donations here.
100% of all donations to Turoks.Net will be spent on having a good time.