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If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic! Simply pour a cup of
boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost
instantly removed.
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Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone
else to hold them while you chop away.
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Avoid arguments about lifting or lowering the toilet seat by simply
using the sink.
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For high blood pressure sufferers: Just cut yourself and bleed for a
few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.
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A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from
rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
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If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, and then you
will be afraid to cough.
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Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget
about the toothache.
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You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and
should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
Note: When applying these home remedies, remember to be really nice
to your family and friends. You never know when you might need them to empty
your bedpan. |