Fun Things to Do at Wal-Mart

Run up to someone randomly and shout "Oh my God, you were on Jersey Shore!"
  -- or --
Run up to someone randomly, clench your teeth together, and say as loud as you can "Ermahgerd! U wer ern Jerser Sher!"

Take pictures of the shoppers and post them on PeopleOfWallmart.com.

Get in a cart and have a friend push you around the store yelling "The British are coming! The British are coming!"

Put as many boxs of condoms as your cart will hold, then abandon the cart in the toy section.

Wear a plastic crown and get someone to push you around in the cart while you wave. It's amazing how many people will wave back.

Go to a drinking fountian or bath-room sink and get your pants wet. Then run around the store yelling "Mommy, I made a peepee!"

Bring some hard-core porn magazines and place them in the magazine section and in peoples' carts when they arent looking.

Swap around the shoes. Create 'left only' or 'right only' pairs, switch one shoe for another of the same style in another size, or exchange boxes entirely. Inventory chaos!

Ask the clerk in the food department where the Kosher hams are.

Go to the restroom and catch someone pooping. Turn out the light as you leave. It is pitch dark.

Make up a fake item and ask a new employee if they can help you find it. Meanwhile, have your little brother or sister throw a tantrum about wanting the item you made up.

Bring employees from other retail stores (Target, Sears, Kmart etc.) and have them start "'helping" customers, preferably giving them the wrong directions to the product they are looking for.

Find a phone to make a storewide announcement. Start the announcement with "Attention K-Mart Shoppers", then use your imagination to advertise a sale. (NB: Do not make racially insensitive announcements.)

With some friends, play football with a roll of paper towels.

Get a bunch of friends and have a race with Shopping carts.

Ride one of the kiddie bicycles up and down the aisles while yelling "Mom! Mom! The Wal-Mart people are after me!"

Walk through the parking lot setting off as many car alarms possible.

Act like a manikin. Then when people walk by, follow them and freeze when they turn to look at you.

Stand next to a bunch of people in the aisle, fart very deliberately, and walk away.

Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.

Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares... and see what happens.

Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

Buy ammo and menstrual pads at the same time. At check-out, tell the clerk to hurry since your husband is waiting.

Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!"

When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

While walking through the store with a loaded cart, pretend you tripped and push the cart down the aisle at high speed, while falling and hitting other people.

Take security stickers off of items and place them on random people so while they walk out the door the alarms go off.

Put CDs in someone's sweatshirt hood so it will set off a door alarm when they exit.

Play hide and seek with your friends.

Listen to music in the cd section and start dancing wildly.

Play soccer with a ball from the store using the whole store as your playing field.

Walk up to an employee, and say "Can I help you?"

Turn on on all the radios in the electronics department, set them to different stations, and crank-up the volume.

Go to the digital camera department, have a friend take pictures of you with several different cameras, then (using cables you have brought) download them to your laptop.

Mosh to classical music.

Go around to random people and pretend you are a chicken. When they look at you funny, make a disgusted facial expression and say "Cluck you!" and walk away.

Put a pillow under your shirt, spill some water at your feet, and loudly scream "My water just broke!"