Lovecraft's
Necronomicon For Morons

Reverence for the Rest of Us®

The Fun and Easy Way to Summon Agents of Darkness™

Your First Aid Kit™ for
Tortured and Troubled Souls
Lost in Alien Dimensions

What to Do When Bad Things Happen™
Explained in Plain English and Whimpering Cries

"I knew this experiment wouldn't work ... Huh?! ... Who are you?!!! How did you get here? ... my GOD ... WHAT are you?! ... What have I done? ... AAARGGGHHH"-- James Randi, amazed Necronomicon reader. Found on an audio taped journal in an otherwise empty cabin.

"Necronomicon For Morons® can serve as your Silver Key™ to portals through time and space." -- Y. Sothoth

Step into a new and improved world, "not in the spaces we know but between them". Walk serene with those "primal, undimensioned and ... unseen".

As it is said, "The Old Ones were, the Old Ones are, and the Old Ones shall be." This naturally intimidates some people -- relax and read Necronomicon For Morons® to learn how to summon the Old Ones and their Awesome Powers. Abdul Alhazred's humorous, easy-to-follow style makes evocation of the Old Ones practically automatic.